05.11.06
Posted in faith, pet peeves at 8:34 am by Brandon
Since I wrote my Christian t-shirt post, a number of you have voiced the concern that if you’re causing people to have conversations with you about God, it’s okay to wear “Witness wear.” My response follows.
Everybody seems pretty fucking wound up about the notion that they should get to wear what they want, don’t they? I’m starting to think that this is more about freedom of speech than anything else. Perhaps it is. Rest assured violent, militant, and defensive Christian T-Shirt wearers that I have no desire to infringe on your RIGHT to wear a stupid t-shirt. It’s written into the constitution, you can–as long as it’s decent–wear whatever the hell you’d like.
Everybody also seems pretty fucking wound up with the idea that if their shirt causes a conversation about God to happen, then their brave attempts at evangelizing the godless bastards–you know, non-evangelicals–should be sung from the mountain tops. (Screw those yodelers, anyway.)
Let me say this directly. Perhaps (and that’s a big fucking perhaps) the conversations that are spurred from the wearing of these “Christian-hip” duds, are helpful. Maybe, but I’m not so concerned with the one conversation that DOES happen.
For me, what’s more concerning are the FIFTEEN or so conversations that DON’T happen because you’ve got to exercize your motherfucking right to have the words “Prayer Warrior” emblazoned across your chest.
Rest assured tacky-shirt-wearers, the vast majority of the world is no longer intrigued by your sometimes-insightful-most-times-idiotic textiles. No the rest of the world sees them and you as a stupid, ignorant fool. The God Hates Fags people use the same tactic, you know. Sure, they craft messages that are intended to catch your eye in order to spur on a conversation. (Side note: Josh and Steve interviewed Shirley Phelps Roper over at Stupid Church People, it’s actually pretty fascinating–give it a listen.)
My suggestion to all of you who desperately feel the need to be identified publicly as a Christian is this: Instead of wearing a shirt that essentially says, “I’m saved”, live a life that practices your ressurection. You shouldn’t need to don a piece of cloth for people to know your faith. And, frankly, I’d bet good money that if you practiced your ressurection on your sleeve rather than a tacky-ass message, a whole lot less people would write you off as a blow hard hypocrite.
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Posted in faith, pet peeves at 8:34 am by Brandon
Since I wrote my Christian t-shirt post, a number of you have voiced the concern that if you’re causing people to have conversations with you about God, it’s okay to wear “Witness wear.” My response follows.
Everybody seems pretty fucking wound up about the notion that they should get to wear what they want, don’t they? I’m starting to think that this is more about freedom of speech than anything else. Perhaps it is. Rest assured violent, militant, and defensive Christian T-Shirt wearers that I have no desire to infringe on your RIGHT to wear a stupid t-shirt. It’s written into the constitution, you can–as long as it’s decent–wear whatever the hell you’d like.
Everybody also seems pretty fucking wound up with the idea that if their shirt causes a conversation about God to happen, then their brave attempts at evangelizing the godless bastards–you know, non-evangelicals–should be sung from the mountain tops. (Screw those yodelers, anyway.)
Let me say this directly. Perhaps (and that’s a big fucking perhaps) the conversations that are spurred from the wearing of these “Christian-hip” duds, are helpful. Maybe, but I’m not so concerned with the one conversation that DOES happen.
For me, what’s more concerning are the FIFTEEN or so conversations that DON’T happen because you’ve got to exercize your motherfucking right to have the words “Prayer Warrior” emblazoned across your chest.
Rest assured tacky-shirt-wearers, the vast majority of the world is no longer intrigued by your sometimes-insightful-most-times-idiotic textiles. No the rest of the world sees them and you as a stupid, ignorant fool. The God Hates Fags people use the same tactic, you know. Sure, they craft messages that are intended to catch your eye in order to spur on a conversation. (Side note: Josh and Steve interviewed Shirley Phelps Roper over at Stupid Church People, it’s actually pretty fascinating–give it a listen.)
My suggestion to all of you who desperately feel the need to be identified publicly as a Christian is this: Instead of wearing a shirt that essentially says, “I’m saved”, live a life that practices your ressurection. You shouldn’t need to don a piece of cloth for people to know your faith. And, frankly, I’d bet good money that if you practiced your ressurection on your sleeve rather than a tacky-ass message, a whole lot less people would write you off as a blow hard hypocrite.
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dorsey said,
May 11, 2006 at 9:56 am
Doesn’t scripture mention living your life in such a way that, when someone speaks evil of you, they’re put to shame because no one believes them?
On the other hand, the shirt’s only fifteen bucks.
dougb said,
May 11, 2006 at 10:24 am
But, look! It looks like the mountain dew label, but says ‘Meant to Die’ instead! Aren’t I instantly culturally relevant and hip? Those crazy skateboard kids will certainly want to talk to me about Jesus now!
This also reminds me of when i began parting with my indoctrinated reformed upbringing, and *gasp* removed the Jesus fish from my car and didn’t vote republican; much to my mothers chagrin. (to be honest, removing the Jesus fish was mostly to help out the christian name, so the folks that i cut-off didn’t have a demographic to curse besides young white male.)
X-Evolutionist said,
May 11, 2006 at 11:22 am
I’m been wearing Christian tshirts since I got saved nine years ago. I want to tell the world why I believe in God.
X
benjamin said,
May 11, 2006 at 12:27 pm
Musn’t… take… bait… musn’t… take… bait…..
Kyle said,
May 11, 2006 at 12:47 pm
Ben,
It’s even harder if you look up the pink flowery site…
X-Evolutionist said,
May 11, 2006 at 2:19 pm
Pink flowery site?
X
http://spaces.msn.com/X-Evolutionist
Rich said,
May 11, 2006 at 3:45 pm
How about a t-shirt that says I’m with stupid who bought the stupid Christian t-shirt?
Recovering said,
May 11, 2006 at 6:07 pm
Amen, Brother Brandon…
I think the only “Christian T-Shirt” I would wear is this one.
But, hey, if you want to wear cheesy Christian T-Shirts, suck on Testa-Mints, put a fish on your car, and give other various kinds of “Jesus Junk” to your friends and family for x-mas and birthdays, more power to you. I respect a guy who refuses to eat secular mints or who thinks that a Promise Keeper’s shirt is effective evangelism…
Evangelicals, can’t live with ‘em…pass the beer nuts…
Brandon said,
May 11, 2006 at 7:10 pm
X,
It must be terribly rough to have a medical condition in which you’ve lost complete use of your mouth and limbs and brain…
shelly said,
May 11, 2006 at 9:58 pm
My suggestion to all of you who desperately feel the need to be identified publicly as a Christian is this: Instead of wearing a shirt that essentially says, “I’m saved”, live a life that practices your ressurection. You shouldn’t need to don a piece of cloth for people to know your faith. And, frankly, I’d bet good money that if you practiced your ressurection on your sleeve rather than a tacky-ass message, a whole lot less people would write you off as a blow hard hypocrite.
Not to mention you’d save $15 (give or take) from not buying those tacky shirts. That’s $15 more you could either: 1) donate to missions; 2) buy a cooler t-shirt with; 3) donate to your church; 4) a combination of 1-3; or 5) do something else entirely.
Bill Kell said,
May 11, 2006 at 11:30 pm
No T shirts, I agree. Met a man recently who was wearing a “Jesus” belt buckle and I was afraid to make eye contact.
Steve J said,
May 12, 2006 at 2:52 am
I’ve got a christian tattoo.
that way only people who see me naked will want to talk about god.
does that count?
timmer k. said,
May 12, 2006 at 8:11 am
Last year I went to a Christian music festival. All the ridiculous shirts caused me to break into a cold sweat…
…even though it was 90 degrees every day.
Kyle said,
May 12, 2006 at 9:26 am
timmer,
Two things about the Christian music festival phenomenon that make it not quite as scary:
1. Most of these kids act all punk/Goth/God-crazy/etc. for the duration of the festival (or until the dye washes out of their hair) and then they return to as close to normal as they used to be, thus limiting most damage to the festival grounds itself (this mirrors perhaps the only real encouraging trend about such “Christian” consumer products: the location of “Christianized” gear tends to match the social isolation of evangelicals; back when I used to wear such crap (I shudder to remember), you better believe I only wore these shirts at youth group and Christian concerts, not at my public high school).
2. Sometimes there’s a diamond in the rough, often from the near-anarchists that occasionally set up shop. In the late 90s, one of my friends found a shirt that had an American flag on it with the caption “Legalize Thought” along the bottom, which has become only more appropriate since we entered the Bush II era.
X,
Yes, pink and flowery, and I’m not only talking in a botanical sense.
rick said,
May 12, 2006 at 1:53 pm
I love this post. You got me laughing because I just posted about my tee shirt from 12-15 years ago. It said, “Be who you are.” Granted, it’s not a “Lord’s Gym” tank but it seems many of us are attempting to make statements rather than attempting to “be” a statement.
How ’bout something like:
“My parents attended the local community church and all I got was this lousy fucking tee-shirt.”
The question we really need to be asking is “What would Jesus Do?”
or better yet, “What would Jesus wear?”
DaveShack said,
May 12, 2006 at 4:10 pm
I think maybe there’s a level on which people wear Christian t-shirts to avoid having people ask them for their shirts/cloaks. They know that having a non-believer wearing one of those shirts would be like allowing the unjustified to take communion.
And then how does the Walk for Life tie into walking that extra mile? Your turn.
X-Evolutionist said,
May 13, 2006 at 7:44 am
Hey Guys!
I would have never realized this was such a controversal issue.
I’ve worn jeans and tshirts my whole life. Except, now that I’m a Christian, my tshirts praise Jesus. Not much has changed at all.
X
My Christian Testimony:
http://spaces.msn.com/x-evolutionist/blog/cns!25A0033DD834DD1D!716.entry
My Blog:
http://spaces.msn.com/members/X-Evolutionist/
wildwest said,
May 13, 2006 at 10:13 am
First the Bible forbade violence and injustice, but 300 years after Jesus people got tired of being outcasts and sold out to the establishment to gain power. They got a lot more converts, too. Not willing converts, necessarily, but hey.
But they remembered that the Bible forbade long hair on men, at least by the time Nixon was elected. They also remembered the Bible forbade tattooing and homosexuality. (Couldn’t forget the *important* stuff, could you?)
Then somebody realized that wimpy Christian men who had cultivated the Boy Scout image and talked with a lithp, could gain more converts among the bikers and intellectuals by growing their hair long like all the other hep cats in the 70s, so they broke the rule. OK, just one rule, but hey. If it gains more converts.
Then at some point some long-haired Christian bikers started sporting tattoos saying things like, “Satan sucks” and “Satan is a pansy, but Jesus kicks ass.” “Dude, that tattoo really rocks! Who’s this Jesus?” Turned more macho men on to Jesus than were ever turned on to acid by Ken Kesey. OK, so we broke a second rule, but hey. More converts. More violence. More votes for Republicans. What rule will be broken next to gain even more?
Right now it looks like Dubya is in desperate need of a new base. Will this be worth the risk?
The next Christian rock band: Gay Bykers on Jesus
Judas said,
May 13, 2006 at 7:54 pm
Hey man, I can relate
Jeff said,
May 13, 2006 at 9:12 pm
Interesting comments - but no one has said if they’re happy or not!
To be honest, if our faith doesn’t help us with leading satisfied, fulfilling lives, why have one? OR if we don’t have a satisfied, fulfilling life, why yell about somebody who does? Jealousy?
We should all be focused on figuring out how to live together on this planet in relative peace. If our faith leads us in this direction, it’s constructive. If not, why not? So whatever your views, I’d love to hear about how we can change the world for the better!
Jeff (Sunday School teacher)
chris said,
May 15, 2006 at 5:17 pm
wow….
i semi-see where you are coming from. I agree with you on a christian should have God in his heart more so than on his shirt sleeve.
Kevin said,
May 15, 2006 at 7:13 pm
Christian shirts I would wear.
Diggadee said,
May 18, 2006 at 2:03 am
I’m with Brandon and Dorsey and Shelly on this one. “Christian” t-shirts don’t praise God, your life does (or doesn’t.) “Christian” t-shirts are like any other advertising t-shirt — they’re designed to manipulate other people.
I did enjoy reading Jeff’s happy thoughts. It’s all about being happy, isn’t it?
Jeff’s happy thoughts and this t-shirt thread (ha! a pun) inspired me to re-write the third line of that old song I learned in Babbtist Sunday school:
“If you’re happy and you know it, shake your ass. (shake, shake)
If you’re happy and you know it, shake your ass. (shake, shake)
If you’re happy and you know it,
then your ‘Christian’ t-shirt will surely show it,
If you’re happy and you know it, shake your ass. (shake, shake)”
But seriously, I think those “Christian” advertising shirts are probably a good idea, for the same reason I appreciate other advertising t-shirts that I see.
…When I see someone wearing a t-shirt advertising Hooters or Budweiser, I can see, from a safe distance, this is an asshole, a person to be avoided.
…When I see someone wearing a t-shirt with a “Christian” advertisement, I can see, from a safe distance, this is a christianist whack-job, a person to be avoided.
I think there would be many much more happy happy lucky joy if we:
1. Stop trying to manipulate the heathen with tacky christianist advertising
2. Start living a Christ-filled life (which, of course, means no more hating, violence, militarism, capitalism, wars against “terrorism,” wars for oil, exploitation of minorities and women, exploitation of third world people, sexual repression, sexual abuse, child abuse, domestic violence, political oppression, prisons…oh dear! That means Christians can’t be Republicans…or Democrats, either.)
It’s much easier to wear a christianist t-shirt than to be a Christian.
THAT’S why people buy them.
X-Evolutionist said,
May 18, 2006 at 12:23 pm
It’s a good thing we are all entitled to have our opinions and to decide what clothes we want to wear.
X
My Christian Testimony:
http://spaces.msn.com/x-evolutionist/blog/cns!25A0033DD834DD1D!716.entry
My Blog:
http://spaces.msn.com/members/X-Evolutionist/
ninjanun said,
May 18, 2006 at 9:53 pm
What’s it called when you pimp your site on someone else’s, more popular (and infinitely more enjoyable) blog by making snappy one-liners in the comments section and providing links to your blog?
Diggadee said,
May 18, 2006 at 10:42 pm
When you pimp your superficial pinkness and your overwrought, emotionally manipulative “testimony” on an infinitely more enjoyable blog, it’s called christianism. Just like a Jesus t-shirt.
And just to be a little more clear, so no-one gets confused by satire…christianism, as practiced by the so-called “evangelical” crowd (Robertson, Bush, Santorum, Dobson, Delay, Frist, Falwell, Cheney) and their ever-so-devoted and hateful followers, has almost nothing to do with being a Christian (as in emulating Jesus Christ.)
Leighton said,
June 3, 2006 at 11:49 am
The only terms for this that you can say in polite company are dishonest advertising, trolling for traffic and blog-whoring. It’s a bannable offense in most blog-communities.
Kirala said,
June 3, 2006 at 8:53 pm
There are worse things than Christian T-shirts. I grew out of being deeply amused by them somewhere around the age of 13, but the vast majority are tacky at worst. And a lot of evangelical teens wear them, I suspect, in lieu of going up to people to Perform The Evangelical Duty; given the sort of training most evangelical teens get in evangelizing, this substitution is desirable.
And who knows? God works in mysterious ways. I know of an overzealous young man who informed his decent, loving, but agnostic father that he was more like Hitler than like Christ. It was only a matter of years before the young man deeply regretted it and the father became a Christian in spite of it all. Perhaps idiot fundagelicalism does less harm to its stated purpose than we might think.
dorsey said,
June 4, 2006 at 11:05 am
One of the most remarkable things about Christian faith is that it survives in spite of us.
manders said,
June 8, 2006 at 11:56 pm
Brandon, I agree with you about the t-shirts and what they are really saying. I believe the scriptures instructed us to “confess” more than to “advertise”. So, I share with you my special pet peeve as well (other than the cost of Bibles and Christian bookstores in general) - Christian effin bumper stickers. Let’s drive like sh*t and put a bumper sticker on the car that says, “Follow me to {Name of Saint or Other Christianese Term Here} Church, a place of {One or more references to the gifts of the Spirit Here} for all of God’s people”…… Or, the best one yet, let’s slap us a fish symbol on our trunk with a bunch of other little fishies next to it (to represent our many children) so you can look at it as we cut you off in traffic and give you the happy finger out the window. The point here is, if you are going to advertise the “product”, you better be able to present it…. because I am not feeling the love from the majority of those “advertising” it. Please just do as we are commanded, love one another, and that may be as simple an expression as using your turn signal in traffic or as grand as keeping your mouth shut when you feel your justified in speaking hateful things to someone who has offended you.
Peace.
jay said,
June 16, 2006 at 7:22 pm
wow……this is great….these t-shirts must really convict a lot of nonbelievers…..don’t you know that this is why they were made in the first place?…..praise God
carm.org
Wags said,
July 9, 2006 at 9:05 pm
Manders nailed it. If you’re going to talk the talk, make sure that you’re walking the walk. The safest course (and the one with the New Testament seal of approval) is to live your life in a Christ-like way, so that others will take notice and want to know more, rather than to call attention to yourself as living for Christ and then fall embarrassingly short with the spotlight on you.
Amy said,
July 11, 2006 at 12:42 pm
I think everyone on here needs to temper their opinion with love… but I personally think that living a Christ-like life is a whole lot better than wearing some cheesy t-shirt that just reeks of “Christian” consumerism–to me those shirts say “I am sanctified because I wear this cheesy t-shirt” when really the wearer should focus on loving the outcast and taking care of the poor.
X-Evolutionist said,
July 23, 2006 at 9:32 am
My hubby and I have a running discussion about King David. He was a musician, and as we all know, really knew how to worship. If David were alive today, he would be lead quitar in a hard rock Christian band. He would also lead worship at church wearing Christian Tshirts with jeans in the winter and shorts in the summer. He wouldn’t worry about how holy he looked at church. The only person we need to care about is Jesus Christ.
Rock on!
X
http://x-evolutionist.spaces.msn.com/
Brandon said,
July 23, 2006 at 1:28 pm
Bullshit. We need to care about a whole hell of a lot more people than that. We need to reach out to the oppressed, we need to love the unloved, we need to feed and clothe the poor.
What we don’t need to do is, instead of giving them the love that IS the gospel, hand them some kitsch-y slogan on the front of some sweatshop-sewn T-shirt, and tell them that God is the answer to all their problems–promising them wealth and prosperity.
If you want to waste your time speculating on the textiles that King David would adorn himself with if he were a current day worship leader, go ahead. Just spare the rest of us your prattle.
Eric said,
July 31, 2006 at 12:38 am
I enjoyed reading all of everyone’s comments, I think everyone has a great point, and I think most everyone is getting at the same thing. That is, that we should be living our faith out, and not wearing it. It’s too easy to wear a Christian shirt and then walk right past a homeless person in desperation on the street because your late for some important meeting. It’s much harder to walk down that same street without the Christian shirt and give away whatever shirt you are wearing to that homeless person, and give them what they really need, which may be much more then just the shirt off your back. I think it’s a great discussion! And those of you who have commented on this that don’t believe in Jesus as your Saviour, have really hit the nail on the head of an issue most Christians I know haven’t figured out yet. That is, live your faith, don’t wear it, get out there, and dirty your hands helping people, don’t let your white Christian shirt stay white, whatever you wear, get out there and get it dirty. Just do whatever is going to reach people, get in their lives. Love them! No more of the pretense stuff that says “I love you, and your going to Hell if you don’t believe in Jesus right now!”, I don’t believe that reaches this dying world. Lets try something new, different, whatever it may be. Get out there and go!
Thanks, sorry that was long.
-Eric
X-Evolutionist said,
August 15, 2006 at 9:42 am
It’s very interesting to come here and read the different opinions on this topic. I had no idea that it was such a controversal issue!
X