01.17.06
Posted in beer at 7:58 pm by Brandon
Let me just say this once: Holy shit has it been boring around here lately. I mean, wow, really boring. I don’t think I can handle another post on politics for a while. And, if I’m boring myself, any of you who’re still left must be REALLY bored. I mean, political philosophy is cool and all, but seriously, it’s not as cool as beer.
It seemed prudent to me in this entry on one of the great loves of my life–yes, beer is one of the great loves of my life–to talk a bit about some of the beers I really DON’T like. Some of them just taste bad to me, others well, even saying their name just makes my skin crawl.
So, with no further adieu, my least flavourite beers–and no, that wasn’t a typo:
- Leinenkugel Creamy Dark Lager - Some beers look like they should be good on the bottle. This beer promised smooth drinkability with a nutty finish. All I got was a mouthful of overpowering malt with a nearly non-existent hop finish that left LOTS to be desired. Now, to be fair, it’s been over a year since I’ve given Leinie Creamy Dark a try…of course that’s because I thought it tasted like shit last time I tried it. (Reader’s Note: Brandon doesn’t really do overly malty beers well, feel free to have your own opinion.)
- Bud Light - My cat Thelma drinks beer (only from the bottle, of course) and even she knows the difference between Bud Light and beer. She simply refuses to drink Bud Light, I love her for it. Bud Light is one of the only beers that when I see people drinking Bud Light, I actually think much less of them. No, seriously. I have a running monologue that mumbles something to the effect of “sad excuse…(harumph)…they serve it so damn cold cos’ it tastes like elephant urine warm…(mmmrumph)…pseudo-Pilsen…(grrr)…sad excuse for a beer drinker”. You get the idea.
- Sam Adams - Oktoberfest - When I was in Boston this November, I thought to myself, “Hey, maybe Sam Adams is better in Boston than it is elsewhere!” Friends, I’ve got news for you: It’s not. Once again, I find Sam Adams, particularly their Oktoberfest, to be either significantly underhopped or too heavy.
- Harper’s Micro-Brewery Beers - Now, I’m hesitant to cast an overarching claim of shitty beer on all the beers in a brewery, but when your micro-brewery only brews about 8 or so beers, and I can try them all, I feel that I’m in a good place to comment. First off, I’ll probably keep going to Harpers, because, for the love of God, when you can get yourself 4 pints of beer and walk out of the pub only 7 dollars later, you’ve got yourself a winner, Matilda. But, though the price is right, the beer just sucks. I’m pretty sure that the Spartan Wheat (their most popular brew) was watered down last time I was there. Their brown ale is actually on the border between a Porter and a Stout, their amber is more appropriately labelled a brown ale. Plus, the porter…oh, wait…brown ale I had was doused with so much Black Patent malt it was barely drinkable. I had to order a water…oh, wait…Spartan Wheat to wash it down. I can’t even tell you how much this beer sucks. If you must drink beer go with the Raspberry Wheat (which is okay because it’s flavored so heavily that the crap-tastic rest of the beerflavor won’t bleed through the Raspberry.)
- PBR - I know, I know, all the kids are drinking PBR like it’s going out of style. It’s the latest hip thing. I’m just going to say it first, it has gone out of style and second and most importantly, the stuff tastes like shit. I don’t care if some marketing campaign can convince 18 to 24 year olds that it’s the coolest thing to by themselves a 30 pack of PBR cans for like 9 bucks and drink themselves into oblivion, the stuff tastes worse than the can it comes in. The only way I can even manage a gulp of this crap is if it’s served at a temperature approaching absolute zero.
Now, lest you think I’m a beer snob…oh nevermind. I wear the beer snob badge proudly. If I had my druthers I’d be drinking beer that costs about 10 bucks per 750 mL bottle. However, I don’t get my druthers. Somedays, I have to drink beer that is probably less up-to-snuff than I would prefer. If I have to choose, I tend toward Labatt Blue and Molson Canadian (those Dual Molson Canadian labels get me every time–my favorite is “I’m a scientist. Let’s experiment.”)
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Posted in beer at 7:58 pm by Brandon
Let me just say this once: Holy shit has it been boring around here lately. I mean, wow, really boring. I don’t think I can handle another post on politics for a while. And, if I’m boring myself, any of you who’re still left must be REALLY bored. I mean, political philosophy is cool and all, but seriously, it’s not as cool as beer.
It seemed prudent to me in this entry on one of the great loves of my life–yes, beer is one of the great loves of my life–to talk a bit about some of the beers I really DON’T like. Some of them just taste bad to me, others well, even saying their name just makes my skin crawl.
So, with no further adieu, my least flavourite beers–and no, that wasn’t a typo:
- Leinenkugel Creamy Dark Lager - Some beers look like they should be good on the bottle. This beer promised smooth drinkability with a nutty finish. All I got was a mouthful of overpowering malt with a nearly non-existent hop finish that left LOTS to be desired. Now, to be fair, it’s been over a year since I’ve given Leinie Creamy Dark a try…of course that’s because I thought it tasted like shit last time I tried it. (Reader’s Note: Brandon doesn’t really do overly malty beers well, feel free to have your own opinion.)
- Bud Light - My cat Thelma drinks beer (only from the bottle, of course) and even she knows the difference between Bud Light and beer. She simply refuses to drink Bud Light, I love her for it. Bud Light is one of the only beers that when I see people drinking Bud Light, I actually think much less of them. No, seriously. I have a running monologue that mumbles something to the effect of “sad excuse…(harumph)…they serve it so damn cold cos’ it tastes like elephant urine warm…(mmmrumph)…pseudo-Pilsen…(grrr)…sad excuse for a beer drinker”. You get the idea.
- Sam Adams - Oktoberfest - When I was in Boston this November, I thought to myself, “Hey, maybe Sam Adams is better in Boston than it is elsewhere!” Friends, I’ve got news for you: It’s not. Once again, I find Sam Adams, particularly their Oktoberfest, to be either significantly underhopped or too heavy.
- Harper’s Micro-Brewery Beers - Now, I’m hesitant to cast an overarching claim of shitty beer on all the beers in a brewery, but when your micro-brewery only brews about 8 or so beers, and I can try them all, I feel that I’m in a good place to comment. First off, I’ll probably keep going to Harpers, because, for the love of God, when you can get yourself 4 pints of beer and walk out of the pub only 7 dollars later, you’ve got yourself a winner, Matilda. But, though the price is right, the beer just sucks. I’m pretty sure that the Spartan Wheat (their most popular brew) was watered down last time I was there. Their brown ale is actually on the border between a Porter and a Stout, their amber is more appropriately labelled a brown ale. Plus, the porter…oh, wait…brown ale I had was doused with so much Black Patent malt it was barely drinkable. I had to order a water…oh, wait…Spartan Wheat to wash it down. I can’t even tell you how much this beer sucks. If you must drink beer go with the Raspberry Wheat (which is okay because it’s flavored so heavily that the crap-tastic rest of the beerflavor won’t bleed through the Raspberry.)
- PBR - I know, I know, all the kids are drinking PBR like it’s going out of style. It’s the latest hip thing. I’m just going to say it first, it has gone out of style and second and most importantly, the stuff tastes like shit. I don’t care if some marketing campaign can convince 18 to 24 year olds that it’s the coolest thing to by themselves a 30 pack of PBR cans for like 9 bucks and drink themselves into oblivion, the stuff tastes worse than the can it comes in. The only way I can even manage a gulp of this crap is if it’s served at a temperature approaching absolute zero.
Now, lest you think I’m a beer snob…oh nevermind. I wear the beer snob badge proudly. If I had my druthers I’d be drinking beer that costs about 10 bucks per 750 mL bottle. However, I don’t get my druthers. Somedays, I have to drink beer that is probably less up-to-snuff than I would prefer. If I have to choose, I tend toward Labatt Blue and Molson Canadian (those Dual Molson Canadian labels get me every time–my favorite is “I’m a scientist. Let’s experiment.”)
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Shteevie said,
January 17, 2006 at 8:38 pm
Sick of politics? And you’re not even a Canadian.
Up here we have a federal election going on. The Liberals are attacking the Conservatives and the Conservatives are attacking the NDP and the NDP is attacking the Liberals and the Conservatives, who are also attacking the Liberals.
Gun control, gay marriage, notwithstanding clause, tax cuts, sponsorship scandal, and a partridge in a pear tree
Recovering said,
January 17, 2006 at 8:40 pm
I’m with you outside of the Creamy Dark. It’s one of only two Leine beers worth drinking. The other is their Big Butt Dopplebock. Also, you should try the Sam Adams Brewmasters Collection Boston Ale. It’s a ton better then their regular stuff… Harp Beer is where it is at!
Jim said,
January 17, 2006 at 9:13 pm
Due to impinging economic realities (a new job that is not nearly as good as promised), I may be in the exasperating and, yea, terrifying position of having to give up beer for the foreseeable future. It’s hard to accept. So drink one of your faves for me. Okay?
Brandon said,
January 17, 2006 at 9:31 pm
I’ve done the Boston Ale–still not a fan, Recovering. SA is just so…big.
Zeke said,
January 17, 2006 at 10:29 pm
“Bud or Coors” is sort of like asking if you prefer to be shot in the head or the heart. I’m stunned that crap actually sells, even if it’s half the price of a superior brew.
Shteevie said,
January 18, 2006 at 2:27 am
My trip to Ireland made a Guinness man out of me.
timmer k. said,
January 18, 2006 at 9:21 am
Every time we visit my wife’s side of the family in Iowa, the beer forced upon us by her well-meaning relatives is ICEHOUSE LIGHT. **Cringe** Why not just drink Diet Caffeine Free Mountain Dew? They’re relatively close to the same thing.
This past Thanksgiving, the prospect of spending four days with said in-laws and their beer of choice was too much for the wife and I to handle. In a move to preserve our alcohol-related dignity, we brought a case of the blessed Summit Oktoberfest and a couple four packs of Leffe. Her crazy drunk uncles polished off all the good beer in the first day and a half, leaving me the difficult choice of no beer or Icehouse Light. Those last couple days were a sobering experience in more ways than one.
Maria said,
January 18, 2006 at 12:04 pm
So the PBR revival is nationwide, huh? I thought it was just a Denver thing. There are PBR neon signs in all sorts of bar windows and a lot of places here even have it on tap?!?! Seriously - I only drink PBR once or twice a decade, BUT, when I do it must be out of can!
dougb said,
January 18, 2006 at 1:35 pm
You know why the call it Pabst Blue Ribbon? Because it won a gold medal at the ‘Worlds Columbia Exposition’ in Chicago back in 1893. They had already been putting a blue ribbon on their bottles at that point, and afterwards felt even more justified in doing so, and now we all collectively hate Pabst Blue Ribbon, not just Pabst. Viva Wisconsin!
And my biggest problem with Harpers was always the service at the place, especially on Wednesday nights. (Half-off night. i.e. 1.50 pint night. i.e. every college student with an ID night.) And the rasp. wheat was the best, but i didn’t have as many problems with the normal wheat, though - course, those weren’t the snobbiest days in my life either.
I miss being in the vicinity of the Bells Brewery Distribution radius, though… mmmmOberonmmm….
Shupac said,
January 19, 2006 at 11:06 am
If you’re still in EL, take a trip down the road to Michigan Brewing Co. in Webberville. Harper’s will be a distant, unpleasant memory. They make a few misses, but when they hit, they really hit.
Chris said,
January 19, 2006 at 5:53 pm
I have no idea if you can get it in the good ol’ US of A, but Innis and Gunn make the finest beer I’ve tasted in a very, very long time. Matured in oak casks, just like Scotch (in fact, the casks are used for Scotch after the beer is made) it’s got a wonderful vanilla-y, oaky, whisky-like flavour.
Also, you should obviously be drinking original Czech Budweiser Budvar, which is so much better than the nasty American knocked-off Budweiser it’s just not true.