03.08.05

ccm–my vendetta

Posted in faith at 10:55 pm by

Okay, yes. Three posts in one day is a bit on the ‘neurotic’ side of things, even for me. What can I say, I’m going away this weekend (sunny Florida here I come) and I have a lot of pent up blogging to get out of my system. This entry has been rattling around in my brain for some time. The truth is, I don’t want to write it.

Why not? I don’t know. I hate to be just one more voice singing the ‘CCM sucks’ hymn. It doesn’t sound much like a positive message, nor is it a very popular one in many circles. The statement, “CCM sucks,” brings with it almost immediate and vehement approval, or immediate and vehement disapproval from the hearers of said statement. When you criticize CCM, you don’t change very many minds. What you get is a bunch of people in the choir nodding their heads dogmatically, and a bunch of people who respond dogmatically, thoughtlessly, quickly, and often with a complete disregard for tact. The choir, of course, looks forward to swooping down upon these folks.

I’m really not looking for either response. I’m writing this post because I’m seeing some things out there in CCM land that just make me long for a big bonfire wherefore to throw all the Fender Stratocasters (or perhaps I should say Daisy Rock Guitars ™) in the world onto said fire so that I could dance naked around the flames hooting and hollering all the while. A touch fanciful? Yes. How I feel? Also, yes.

So, I’m not going to try to format a big decalogue/diatribe about CCM and EVERYTHING that’s wrong with it. I merely want to share with you some of the issues that have arisen in my heart that deeply concern me. So, with no drum roll, and no particular order here’s what I’m thinking:

On the issue of the Christian Music Makeover site:

Well, let me put it to you this way. I have a hard time reading the site while simultaneously suppressing the extreme urge to vomit. Why? Good question, I’m glad I asked.

These folks see fit to offer some guidelines for folks who would visit their ‘physical makeover’ portion of the site. Here’s an excerpt of the disclaimer:

The information in this site is meant to supplement, not replace, proper exercise training. All forms of exercise pose some inherent risks. ChristianMusicMakeover.com advises readers to take full responsibility for their safety and know their limits. Do not exercise or take risks beyond your level of experience, aptitude, training, and fitness. The exercise and dietary information in this site is not intended as a substitute for any exercise routine or treatment or dietary regimen that may have been prescribed by your doctor. As with all dietary and exercise programs, you should get your doctor’s approval before beginning.

Now, all gratitude due to the Christian Music Makeover folks. It’s probably good that they have this disclaimer on their ‘physical makeover’ section of the site. It gives the impression that a physical makeover is hard work, and they’re right. It is hard work to have a physical makeover (sans the surgical proceedures, that is.)

What gives me a bit more pause is that these folks also offer a portion of their website to the Spiritual Makeover. Now, if the devotionals offered on this page–there’ve been 4 to date from January 13 till now–are intended to be any type of exhaustive or rigorous spiritual excercize, I think the readers of Christian Music Makeover deserve a bit of disclaimer. The site offers none.

Here’s my version of what an appropriate disclaimer would look like:

The information in this site is meant to supplement, not replace, proper pursuit of spiritual things. All forms of spiritual exercise pose some inherent risks. ChristianMusicMakeover.com advises readers to take full responsibility for their safety and know their limits. Do not pursue Christ or take risks beyond your level of experience, aptitude, training, and fitness. The scriptural or devotional information in this site is not intended as a substitute for any Biblical study that may have been prescribed by your pastor. As with all devotional programs, you should get your pastor’s approval before beginning.

Frankly, though, you shouldn’t really expect much at all in the lines of spiritual growth from the devotionals offered on this site. Honestly, they really aren’t likely to be that spiritually challenging. Please strongly consider consulting an outside source for your spiritual growth.

On the issue of the general crappiness of lyrics:

Dear CCM listeners, for years your love of 3 chord songs has superceeded your desire and quest for meaningful lyrics. I plead with you, please friends, please demand more from the industry. You’ve heard all the ‘God is all I need’, ‘I’m so happy cuz’ I’m with Jesus,’ ‘I’m a Jesus Freak,’ ‘God kicks ass and takes names,’ etc. (ad infinitum) that you need. Pack up the dreams. It’s time to move on.

In being satisfied with and listening to the crap CCM passes off as a message you’ve aided and abedded these folks in propogating the disease of idiocy and anti-intellectualism that is quickly ruining the Church. When these folks spin this ‘everything goes better with God’ line of bullshit, and not a true message of how bad life can suck (i.e. drugs, death, divorce, suicide, hate, racism, alcoholism, addiction, and all other categories of lousy) sometimes and that God’s love supercedes all suckiness, they are lying to you. Wait. Hang on. Yes…let me repeat, they are lying to you. LYING. Stop being a vehicle for this smut.

Conclusion

Friends, it may be best if I let this essay draw to a close. I’m two beers in and I fear that if I don’t quit now, I may get venomous. I’d best stop writing–God knows, I’m not going to stop drinking.

A final note, though, to CCM producers everywhere. In the words of John Stewart, “Just…stop. It’s not so much that you’re bad–although you are bad, it’s that you’re hurting America.”

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ccm–my vendetta

Posted in faith at 10:55 pm by

Okay, yes. Three posts in one day is a bit on the ‘neurotic’ side of things, even for me. What can I say, I’m going away this weekend (sunny Florida here I come) and I have a lot of pent up blogging to get out of my system. This entry has been rattling around in my brain for some time. The truth is, I don’t want to write it.

Why not? I don’t know. I hate to be just one more voice singing the ‘CCM sucks’ hymn. It doesn’t sound much like a positive message, nor is it a very popular one in many circles. The statement, “CCM sucks,” brings with it almost immediate and vehement approval, or immediate and vehement disapproval from the hearers of said statement. When you criticize CCM, you don’t change very many minds. What you get is a bunch of people in the choir nodding their heads dogmatically, and a bunch of people who respond dogmatically, thoughtlessly, quickly, and often with a complete disregard for tact. The choir, of course, looks forward to swooping down upon these folks.

I’m really not looking for either response. I’m writing this post because I’m seeing some things out there in CCM land that just make me long for a big bonfire wherefore to throw all the Fender Stratocasters (or perhaps I should say Daisy Rock Guitars ™) in the world onto said fire so that I could dance naked around the flames hooting and hollering all the while. A touch fanciful? Yes. How I feel? Also, yes.

So, I’m not going to try to format a big decalogue/diatribe about CCM and EVERYTHING that’s wrong with it. I merely want to share with you some of the issues that have arisen in my heart that deeply concern me. So, with no drum roll, and no particular order here’s what I’m thinking:

On the issue of the Christian Music Makeover site:

Well, let me put it to you this way. I have a hard time reading the site while simultaneously suppressing the extreme urge to vomit. Why? Good question, I’m glad I asked.

These folks see fit to offer some guidelines for folks who would visit their ‘physical makeover’ portion of the site. Here’s an excerpt of the disclaimer:

The information in this site is meant to supplement, not replace, proper exercise training. All forms of exercise pose some inherent risks. ChristianMusicMakeover.com advises readers to take full responsibility for their safety and know their limits. Do not exercise or take risks beyond your level of experience, aptitude, training, and fitness. The exercise and dietary information in this site is not intended as a substitute for any exercise routine or treatment or dietary regimen that may have been prescribed by your doctor. As with all dietary and exercise programs, you should get your doctor’s approval before beginning.

Now, all gratitude due to the Christian Music Makeover folks. It’s probably good that they have this disclaimer on their ‘physical makeover’ section of the site. It gives the impression that a physical makeover is hard work, and they’re right. It is hard work to have a physical makeover (sans the surgical proceedures, that is.)

What gives me a bit more pause is that these folks also offer a portion of their website to the Spiritual Makeover. Now, if the devotionals offered on this page–there’ve been 4 to date from January 13 till now–are intended to be any type of exhaustive or rigorous spiritual excercize, I think the readers of Christian Music Makeover deserve a bit of disclaimer. The site offers none.

Here’s my version of what an appropriate disclaimer would look like:

The information in this site is meant to supplement, not replace, proper pursuit of spiritual things. All forms of spiritual exercise pose some inherent risks. ChristianMusicMakeover.com advises readers to take full responsibility for their safety and know their limits. Do not pursue Christ or take risks beyond your level of experience, aptitude, training, and fitness. The scriptural or devotional information in this site is not intended as a substitute for any Biblical study that may have been prescribed by your pastor. As with all devotional programs, you should get your pastor’s approval before beginning.

Frankly, though, you shouldn’t really expect much at all in the lines of spiritual growth from the devotionals offered on this site. Honestly, they really aren’t likely to be that spiritually challenging. Please strongly consider consulting an outside source for your spiritual growth.

On the issue of the general crappiness of lyrics:

Dear CCM listeners, for years your love of 3 chord songs has superceeded your desire and quest for meaningful lyrics. I plead with you, please friends, please demand more from the industry. You’ve heard all the ‘God is all I need’, ‘I’m so happy cuz’ I’m with Jesus,’ ‘I’m a Jesus Freak,’ ‘God kicks ass and takes names,’ etc. (ad infinitum) that you need. Pack up the dreams. It’s time to move on.

In being satisfied with and listening to the crap CCM passes off as a message you’ve aided and abedded these folks in propogating the disease of idiocy and anti-intellectualism that is quickly ruining the Church. When these folks spin this ‘everything goes better with God’ line of bullshit, and not a true message of how bad life can suck (i.e. drugs, death, divorce, suicide, hate, racism, alcoholism, addiction, and all other categories of lousy) sometimes and that God’s love supercedes all suckiness, they are lying to you. Wait. Hang on. Yes…let me repeat, they are lying to you. LYING. Stop being a vehicle for this smut.

Conclusion

Friends, it may be best if I let this essay draw to a close. I’m two beers in and I fear that if I don’t quit now, I may get venomous. I’d best stop writing–God knows, I’m not going to stop drinking.

A final note, though, to CCM producers everywhere. In the words of John Stewart, “Just…stop. It’s not so much that you’re bad–although you are bad, it’s that you’re hurting America.”

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Trackback URL »

http://www.badchristian.com/2005/03/08/ccm_my_vendetta/trackback/